Frantically.

Everyday i feel like i am frantically crawling my way up to the surface. Every day i tell myself to not be a wuss. To get out of bed, that it won’t be so bad, that i could maybe cheer myself up with a really good sammich. Which you know is my ultimate goal. If someone could create a never-empty-fridge i would die a happy lady.  Every day i tell myself that it’s okay if i mess up, if i dont eat the best food, if i dont get everything done. I dont need to be on a quest for perfection, i need to just be okay with myself. It’s not saying there is no room for improvement, it’s why we are human.

Another thing i am tired of is defending myself. Especially towards people i really like. I’m tired of being nit picked, i am not perfect i don’t claim to be not even in the least bit but i accept your flaws, and maybe just maybe you could give me a damn break.

Yesterday i got hurt, my hip aches, and my cuts are stinging. My wrists are aching and more than anything my ego is bruised. then i shut my foot in Kelly’s car door…stupid door.

Now i am going to head home and pout and eat leftovers from dinner yesterday that i made. i’m very excited about it. since i havent eatten yet.

then i am going to make a peach crisp. and drink me some PBR. its going to be a salvageable night.

I will survive like i always do, another day. no dollar.

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